


Fissures

by Sokorra



Category: Torchwood
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-31
Updated: 2014-08-31
Packaged: 2018-02-15 12:21:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 566
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2228844
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sokorra/pseuds/Sokorra
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Owen contemplates the irony that he figured his life out only once he was dead.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Fissures

**Author's Note:**

> This was just an attempt to see if I could write Owen in any sense. Hopefully he's not out of character.
> 
> This takes place before the season 2 finale.

Owen found it ironic that he hadn’t figured out that he was in love with Tosh until he couldn’t do anything about it. After all his denial, after all the cruel things he had said to her in the last four years they had known each other, he finds out after he’s dead that he loved her.

 

What hurts the most about this whole dead thing once you get past the weird aftereffects of being a dead man is looking into her eyes and knowing that despite his status she still loved him.  He had never known someone to love him so unconditionally like that.

 

He hadn’t wanted to love Tosh.  It felt like a betrayal of Katie. Diana, Gwen, the others.  They were all mindless distractions.  But he had always known that it would never be that way with Tosh.  She was incapable of having a relationship without caring, and he had felt he was incapable of having a relationship and care. Life had proved them both wrong.

 

He supposed he first should have gotten a clue when Tommy showed up and Tosh blushed and giggled around him like a schoolgirl cliche.  Owen had felt the jealousy but called it annoyance at her unprofessional behavior.  He didn’t say much, thinking she did deserve something.  The girl never asked for anything and did so much for the others that allowing her one day with her knight in shining pajama pants was something he could do.  Or at least try.  Owen couldn’t stop his mouth sometimes.

 

But as the years went on, it got harder to ignore the jealousy.  Especially the year before he died.  And especially after he died.  His last living memory was her eyes looking down at him, as if she was in as much pain as he was.  It was how he really knew he was going to die.  But when she lent down and told him she loved him, something broke in him that wasn’t because of being the cursed undead.

 

Owen had expected when he didn’t die again that Tosh would take back her words, that she had only said it in some sort of “comforting the dying” type of thing, but she never did.  She tried saying again and he now hated the words.  Mostly because he wished he could say them back and give her what she wanted...what she needed.

 

But he couldn’t.  He was dead.  He was quite literally a walking talking corpse.  He couldn’t eat, couldn’t drink, needed neither.  He didn’t have to breathe and any injury he got was unhealed.  He figured before too long he’d look like Imhotep’s cousin.

 

He couldn’t give her a happy ending. He probably couldn’t even before death, but at least he could have given her something.  But he couldn’t give her the house in the country with the picket fence and the 2.4 kids (or whatever that statistic was.  He couldn’t picture himself as a father anyway).  She deserved the happily ever after, even if she said she didn’t want it without him.

 

He just wanted her to live.  He wanted her to leave Torchwood, go off and have happy marriage, some kids who looked just like her.  He wanted her to forget about him and the underground hub in Cardiff.

  
But he knew full well she wouldn’t leave.  She wouldn’t leave him,and she wouldn’t leave Jack. 


End file.
